Hate is just another four letter word.

Like L-O-V-E.

I’ve been accused of loving everything – actually becoming obsessed over everything – and it didn’t feel very loving when it was said – but I’m here to tell you that it’s just not true. I can hate blindly and deeply along with the rest of you.

To prove it, I’m giving you my very own Stephen Colbert ON NOTICE list that I originally saw over at Julia’s. I don’t think my post will match the brilliance of hers (and by the way, she stole all the things I hate) but I’m going to give it a go.

People who let their dogs off leash
See here. There are places where you are allowed to have your dog off a leash. Go there. I could give two shits that your dog is so well trained you taught him to shit on cue, keep him on a leash. Oh and my god there’s a special place in hell for those of you who HAVE the leash, in hand, but don’t put it on the dog. Poor little doggies. It must be just awful to live with you.

Slowpokes in the left lane
(Not to be confused with Snakes on a Plane. Those are okay.) PASS on the left. PASS. Not PASS OUT. Move the fuck over.

Islamojewchristianhindufascists
Orginally I had islamojewchristianhindubuddhistfascists but G said that was taking it a bit far. I mean, who ever heard of a buddhist fascist? (Richard Gere doesn’t count.) Also it didn’t fit. Here at January One, we’re all about equal opportunity hatred. I don’t care who you are and what god you might happen to subscribe to – if you kill, maim, disparage, torture, discriminate against, or do anything other than love and respect those that do not believe what you believe IN THE NAME OF YOUR GOD, then you don’t deserve a place on this fine planet. Nuff said.

Party Poopers
You know who these people are. They have something to say about everything and more likely than not it’s negative. You know what? My life isn’t so great all the time, but I CAN CHOOSE not to dwell on the negative. Or at least try not too. It’s going to rain (when the sun’s up in the sky.) You’re doing it wrong (my way or the highway.) She’s happy all the time (walk a minute in my shoes.) GET OVER YOURSELF. If you don’t have anything nice to say, then find another Party Pooper and go to it. There is so much negativity in this world why perpetrate it? And THERE IS SO MUCH DIVERSITY it’s paralyzing sometimes. SO IF YOU DON’T LIKE WHAT I/WE/THEM ARE DOING – GO FIND SOMETHING ELSE!!!

The smell of your cooking
Dude. It might be your favorite dish in the whole freaking world and your grandmother’s secret recipe from the old country and I’m happy for you that the recipe survived three wars, two marriages and a boat ride across the Atlantic BUT I DON’T WANT TO SMELL IT IN MY BEDROOM. Please turn the fan on in your kitchen. That’s why you have it.

Humidity
I’m rendered speechless by the hate.

Entitlement whores

Ah. One of my favorites. I should be able to drive any car/truck I want regardless of its damaging effects on the enviroment and the safety of others because THIS IS AMERICA GODDAMIT! My kid should be able to push your kid around in the sandbox without repercussions because kids will be kids and THIS IS A FREE COUNTRY GODDAMIT! My problems are the most important problems in the world and must be attended to this instant because THAT’S WHAT DEMOCRACY STANDS FOR! I want it NOW. I don’t want to wait. I don’t want to work for it. I WANT IT THE WAY I WANT IT BECAUSE THAT IS MY RIGHT UNDER THE GOOD OL RED WHITE AND BLUE. What happened to this fine country? I’m all for individual freedoms and rights and the pursuit of happiness but we all still have to live together. Whether we like it or not, sometimes that means doing things for the greater good. We’re not all perfect, but we can try a helluva lot harder to RESPECT. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Find out what it means to me.

Pain
Emotional pain. Mental pain. Physical pain. Psychic pain. Pains in the ass. I’m against it all. But especially the pain that my love suffers through every single day. That pain I hate more than anything.

Whew! That felt good! I encourage you all to try it. Thanks person who was so judgemental towards me! I appreciate it!

Yesterday I spent all day fixing up things around here. If you’ll take a moment to notice – I cleaned up the sidebar. There is now a drop down hierarchical topic list for better navigation, as well as a search bar. I hope it makes your reading easier and more efficient. Also, I moved all of the Spin Out information over to its new home: SPIN-OUT.ORG! Getting things ready a bit early for Spin Out 2007. I had a bit of trouble though and accidentally erased the blog for Crossed In Translation. Eventually I will get it all back up – it’s been very very slow for awhile anyway, so I’m not going to kill myself, but BE CAREFUL. Back up your blogs and my god check like eighty times before you hit that delete button.

My back is feeling better – thanks for all the suggestions. I had a really weird episode with a chiro once (had nothing to do with back cracking and everything to do with being half naked in an exam room and being seriously creeped out) so I won’t be going back anytime soon. I’m sure you understand. Anyway, I rested it good yesterday (read: no knitting or spinning) and that seemed to work for me. The other night I did cast on for my BW top down sweater – which meant CROCHET. My god that provisional cast on is fiddly. But I did it and then started the short rows for the shoulders but didn’t like the way I was doing it on the purl side so I ripped and I have yet to go back. I did do some work on my STR Knee High number 2 – I’m past the ribbing so it’s SMOOTH sailing from here on out. Maybe some plying on tap for today. We’ll see.

Have a FANTASTIC DAY!
L, C

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah

Blah.

That’s about it. I got nothing exciting. Nothing exciting at all. There is SO MUCH to do around my house that I’m paralyzed. There is SO MUCH going on in my brain – not much of it good – that I might actually attempt some of the stuff around the house as a way of trying not to think. It’s still hot.

We had a nice dinner last night – G was very happy. I was happy because he was happy. But still. Blah.

I think I’m going to attempt some stuff this morning and spin away my afternoon. I got the wonderful heel/toe roving from Teyani yesterday and I want to finish up some stuff before I spin it. I may start another knee high. Or my Barbara Walker sweater – although I read through the instructions AGAIN and I still can’t make any sense of what she’s talking about. Makes me feel stupid.

And I want to get back to log cabinning. That makes me happy. But it’s big and tedious now. Blah.

I would love to take some pictures. LOVE IT. But it’s still too hot to go outside and I’m feeling paralyzed by the ABC-A-Long in that I can’t think of an L that I like. Sure there’s love and laughter and all those sappy sentimental L words. Give me something good. That will stretch my creativity.

Seriously. Give me an L. I need an L. Any L. It can be a thing or a concept or anything. But just don’t give me Light. I’ve already had that one floating around in my head.

And while you’re giving me an L – give me a book to read. I need something good – something I can sink my teeth in that’s not too depressing – not too mainstream (re: Grisham, et.al.)

Go to it. Help a girl out.

Tuesday means

Saturday SKY!

Sandy – I was thinking of you! Here’s the view from our room on Saturday. We weren’t alone in the sky though:

Apparently big ass ugly spiders LOVE the sky scrapers. Who knew?! They didn’t bother us though – but at one point there were like six of them on the windows. They must be really sticky! Go Spidey GO!

We had a great time (Well I did. G worked a lot.) We went North:

We went South:

And in between met some great people and did a bit of fiber shopping. I’m beat though – we got in last night – and I’m HOT. It was pretty funny – everyone in Chicago kept warning me how hot it was – it was like they thought I lived in Alaska or something. This is what I came home to:

STAY COOL! More about Chi-town tomorrow! Now go say happy birthday to my favorite NORMA!

Chicagoans – what do you think?

Does this look good? Should we meet up there? Lemme know. THANKS!

ardomn

Since it’s Wednesday and my life is all about the random, LET’S GO!

Member how I said something about bad numbers and my trepidation about keeping up with this random thing? Yeah. THERE ARE NO BAD NUMBERS! This thing is totally random – I swear on my STR Stash that I haven’t cheated AT ALL and it looks like it was completely meant to be this way and is totally perfect and oh my god I can’t wait to make my next one! I swear I could NOT come up with anything better than this if I tried for all eternity. RANDOM IS GOD!

The perfect garter stitches are like pearls, plucked from a juicy oyster in the South Sea. FANTASTIC! Right now the piece measures about 16×20 – and I’m no where close to running out of yarn. I’m going all the fucking way!!! My plan right now is to knit until I run out of a color, since they won’t be used evenly, and no matter what the number for that section, I will end the row and then I will continue with the remaining colors until they run out, etc. I’m feeling like there will be great balance in this project. Great and perfect, carefree balance.

And in the “you’re never the first with your brilliant ideas so get over yourself already” department, I saw this link to Pixelated Knitting over at Kellee’s. She’s taken this whole random thing about a gazillion steps further and is doing Sudoku Knitting. And she came up with it way back in April. Very, very cool.

What else? Well, you saw the fun we had packing boxes over at Kay’s but that’s not all the fun I’ve been having. Firstly, let me say thanks for all your suggestions and concerns about mailing out many packages. I think to get USPS pickup you need to weigh the boxes first and pay for shipping and I don’t have the means to weigh the boxes, so I will use the cart my apt building supplies and pile it high then go to the PO around the corner. No biggie. Besides, I love the girls at the Post Office – they are very nice.

Now, on to the fun! I’m not sure if I’ve ever mentioned this or not, but my sister and her husband own a bunch of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream shops (no – they never have freaking ice cream in the house. It’s pathetic!) around and about Philly and South Jersey. Saturday night was a HUGE partay down at The Borgata in AC to celebrate the big opening of their store in the food court there. We stayed overnight, had a FABULOUS dinner, lost $$$ way too quickly (the losing doesn’t necessarily bother me – I gamble for entertainment – the part that bothers me is that I lost quicker than I usually do and I could literally be at the craps table ALL NIGHT. So the fun was over there way too fast.) and DANCED the night away! We had a great VIP Suite at the HOT HOT CLUB (which is very nice for us geeky nerdy completely UNCOOL types who can’t get into clubs at all.) I DANCED AND DANCED with my husband, which I love – he can rock out with the best of them – and my sisters and I had FUN!

This is me with my sister right after I came off the dance floor. I’m sweaty and gross and HAPPY! One of my favorite parts of the evening was my outfit, believe it or not. When my sister was here we shopped and shopped with three kids, the oldest being 5.5, looking for a HOT outfit to wear to the club. Nothing. We are not hot. We are old with kids and fat and ick. But somehow, on Saturday MORNING, right before we had to leave to go to the shore, I found a great pair of jeans, a tight black sleeveless top that allowed me to wear a bra and didn’t show my back (I don’t like my back) and wasn’t obscene, and a FANTASTIC pair of shoes.

I LOVE the shoes! Nine West outlet, $30, comfortable! I wore them all night and at 3:30 AM I was a little bit crippled walking back to my room, but I had worn them since 6:30 and boogied my little heart out so I say BRAVO!

Another thing I received Saturday and which looks dirty and wrinkled in the following picture is my fabulous shirt(s) from Urban Yarns!

I saw them first over at Lauren‘s and immediately went and ordered a long sleeve and a short sleeve! I have barely taken the short sleeve off. I ordered both in the XL and the short sleeve could use a bit of shrinking in the length (and a little in the body) and the long sleeve could probably be a smidge bigger across the bust. Just so you know. I love them!

CHICAGO! Chicago is fast approaching. We’re leaving Friday morning and practically go straight to WRrigley Field (FUCK! You think they’ll let me in now? I’ve been up since 6AM! I’m sorry!!!) when we get there for an afternoon game – against The Mets for pete’s sake. I hate The Mets. GO CUBBIES! I’m free the following times – Friday night, Saturday night, Sunday morning/day, Monday day. WHO WANTS TO ENTERTAIN ME? I’m more than willing to “host” a little get together at my hotel either Friday or Saturday night. We’re staying at a swanky joint so the lobby/bar area should be really really nice. Don’t let me be lonely in a city of such fantastic knitters! 😉

Have a randomly great day!

Wet T-Shirts

See, now, this is why I shouldn’t do housework. Wet. Soaking wet. Although they’ve been sitting there since last night so now they’re probably moldy and wet. Normally G does the laundry. He’s kind of particular about it and apparently I’m just not up to snuff so he does it. Of course, I’m perfectly capable of folding all of the said laundry which is totally a cop out. I mean how hard is it to throw clothes in the washer then move them to the dryer? The folding is where all the skill lies. But I digress. We generally do laundry on Sundays – which is a holdover from apartment living when you had to lug all your clothes down to the basement and save up all your quarters and try not to get grossed out by the other things living down there. We have our own washer and dryer now – in the kitchen under the counter – so why limit laundry to Sundays? Anyway, yesterday was NOT Sunday but somehow we had missed laundry on like the last two Sundays so I was desperate for clothes and thought I’d do a nice thing. I got through the dark load and the white load okay fine. But the delicates (I don’t know – ask G. It’s his system!) didn’t fare so well. I really stuffed the washer, but they made it through that fine – it’s the dryer where everything fell apart. I cleaned out the lint compartment and then went to set the cycle timer and that’s where I think things went bad. The freaking machine won’t turn on. Can I just tell you? ALL MY CLOTHES ARE FREAKING DELICATE! I literally have nothing to wear. Sure, sure, what about all the clothes in the closet? Very funny. You see I’m fat and it’s summer so I have like one pair of pants and two shirts that fit and I feel comfortable in. You know what I’m talking about. And now they’re wet.

I completely blame G for this. When the stove blew up, he kept saying things like “I wonder if everything’s going to start to go bad now. You know it’s been nine years.” JINX JINX JINX! I told him to SHUT UP! Like NINE is the magic number when all your appliances stop working? Is that true? I thought these things are supposed to last forever. When we moved in here all the appliances were from the Stone Age. I swear there was a little fairy or something rubbing two sticks together in the back of the oven. We got everything new then anyway because it was all supremely gross and the cootie factor was enormous. But c’mon? Is everything really supposed to stop working now?

I’m never doing laundry again.

Pay Me My Money Down

First off – the quiz was broken but now it’s fixed. Basically I had to start a new one – if you’ve already taken it, please don’t take it again. Thank you! (Over a hundred of you took the quiz – is it the chance at free yarn, or bless my heart, do you all really want to learn about my religion, BruceSpringsteenOlogy – where it’s okay to take any drug you want?)

I don’t know where to start, really. I’m exhausted. We got home about 1AM and had something to eat then went to bed. But I was up at like 5:30 still thinking about the concert.

I expect a lot from a Springsteen concert. I expect to be transported to another place – a place where everyone pumps their fists in harmony. No, really, I expect to be lifted by the words and music. I expect the bass to pound in my throat and to be thrown into a frenzy and get extremely emotional. And I am RARELY disappointed. Last night was no exception. For the most part.

This time around Bruce is touring with a HUGE band – like 3 or 4 guitarists, bango,back up vocalists, piano, drums, a horn section, two violins, stand up bass, an archordian – there are A LOT of people on stage. And while the sounds of his new album verges on country (which I really don’t like) or hootinan, the horns save it! The horns are everything. (I may be in love with La Bamba!) (OH MY GOD! La Bamba and I went to THE SAME HIGH SCHOOL! HOW COOL IS THAT!!!) The whole concert feels like you’re at a New Orleans funeral. And the songs aren’t his – they are mostly songs that have become part of the fabric of America – old Negro Spirituals, protest songs, ballads. In the liner notes most of them aren’t attributed to any one person – they just are. But the presentation is pure Springsteen – it’s rousing and fun and playful and serious and heartfelt and AMAZING.

The first four songs were a blast. I wore a smile so big my face hurt. I was bouncing around like a kid presented with a puppy – complete with squeals and clapping hands. I was sweating and dancing and singing at the top of my lungs! I WAS IN MY GLORY! I had Bruce and my man by my side and nothing could go wrong.

The next part of the story I’m a bit ashamed about. But I’ll tell it anyway.

I’m not much for public sharing – i.e. movies, concerts, theater, sporting events. I’m acutely aware that there are many people out there just waiting to ruin public experiences for me. No, I’m not paranoid (much) to think that they are DELIBERATELY out there waiting to ruin things for me, but they are there. Waiting. It never fucking fails. I go to the movies and even when it’s empty someone sits next to me and talks the whole freaking time. I go to the theater and someone talks the whole freaking time. So I avoid these situations. I rarely, if ever, see movies in the theater. I’d rather watch at home where the only person who can ruin the experience for me is myself.

Inevitably this happens at concerts as well. Especially Bruce concerts. Bruce’s fan base is such that there are many people stuck in 1984 (the year Born in the USA was released and Bruce became MEGA.) These fans feel it is their god given right to see Bruce in New Jersey whenever he performs, get shit roaring drunk and scream out THUNDER ROAD every opportunity they get. Doesn’t matter if Bruce is alone on stage playing acoustic. Doesn’t matter if it’s the E Street Band. They come and they drink and they scream. It’s really quite a shame because in the end (if they remember anything) they don’t like the show because they don’t get Thunder Road and they don’t get arena rock and still they come. One of my favorite concert moments ever was seeing Bruce at the Beacon Theater in NYC – a very small venue. He was on the Tom Joad tour, which was a solo acoustic tour, and he started the show telling people that he needed quiet to sing these songs and please help him out and still there was one asshole – no doubt from Jersey – who wouldn’t stop yelling out Thunder Road. Bruce stopped, in the middle of the show, and told him in no uncertain terms to SHUT THE FUCK UP. If you don’t believe me – I’ve got it on tape. 😉

Last night, the first four songs were SPECTACULAR! I heard my favorite of the new album – Oh Mary Don’t You Weep, which was followed up by a nothing short of astonishing version of Atlantic City. Really – blew my freaking socks off. I was dancing I was singing I was deliriously happy. It was GLORIOUS. And then this asshole and his girlfriend bogarted their way into the seats next to us. Now, I know when you buy tickets to a concert it’s a crapshoot who your neighbors will be. That’s the price you pay (along with your first born to Ticketbastard.) BUT when assholes show up next to you WHO DON’T EVEN BELONG IN THE SEATS then you have every right to be livid. Don’t you? So these cocksuckers show up and they’re plenty drunk and the girl is holding one of those extra large beaker bottles filled with beer and she kept her bag on her shoulder the whole time so the beer bong thing is swinging around and her bag is swinging around and they’re dancing like drunken fools they are and they have friends two rows up who they keep high fiving with over this poor older woman’s head who wisely stayed in her seat the whole time because really she probably would’ve gotten sucker punched if she stood up. In between songs, when Bruce is talking about the homeless and the death penatly and war, this fucker next to us is shouting “Who loves you Bruce? Philly loves you Bruce! New Jersey loves you Bruce! THUNDER ROAD!!!”

Now I understand full well that this is a concert. People are allowed to dance and SHOULD dance and people are allowed to scream and SHOULD scream (hey I can BROOOOOOOCE along with the best of them – and I do) but the drunken disorderly-ness is UNACCEPTABLE. I will never understand why people pay A LOT of money to come to a concert to get shitfaced. Wouldn’t it be a lot cheaper to stay home and drink that six pack in front of the tape player? You can yell all you want there. It’s just so obnoxious and ignorant and base. And yes I think I’m better than this guy. I really do. Because at the end of the night he’s going to get in his car and drive home drunk and I can only hope he was arrested.

The worst part of all of this? I let the guy ruin my night. I HATE THAT. HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT! I tried so hard to be all zen and say that it was okay and I was there and the music was good but I was so freaking aware of his spastic moves and that his drunk ass girlfriend was thisclose to hitting G in the head and that they yelled through the quiet songs and screamed during Bruce’s talks and that there was nothing I could do about it because anything action on my part of G’s part would’ve ended in a fight and I HATE IT! I LET THE FUCKING DRUNK ASSHOLE WIN!

Really, though, in the end I don’t blame the asshole. He’s an asshole. He has no choice in his life but TO BE AN ASSHOLE. He’s not smart enough to know better. (Or maybe he was – on the drive home I said to G what could that girl have possibly seen in him and we both commented on how we observed that when the girl left (to go buy more beer) the guy became completely normal. He stood there quietly – even sat down. As soon as the girl got back MR. ASSHOLE returned. It was really quite hysterical.) Anyway, I don’t blame the drunk guy. Put beer in front of him, he’s going to drink it. He has no self control. And I really don’t blame the venue either (which was quite nice – Tweeter Center in Camden) – they’re trying to make a buck. I blame Bruce. On the Devils & Dust tour, he made it tour policy that as soon as the lights went down and the concert started, all concessions stands closed. And yes, people were drunk because they spent all day drinking in the parking lot, BUT THEY DIDN’T GET DRUNKER. They got more SOBER as the
night went on. It was one of the most enjoyable experiences ever. And while I don’t expect this at every concert – maybe half way through you cut people off? An hour in? SOMETHING? I can’t believe you enjoyed the THUNDER ROADING any more than I did. In fact, I know you didn’t. So Bruce, my love. Do something!!!! I’m with you all the way, but please. No more.

Whew! That felt good. You may ask why I still go to Bruce concerts when inevitably there will be assholes nearby. Because my friends, those first four songs – when the asshole wasn’t near us – were some of the best moments of my life. And that’s worth all the assholes in the world.

Back later with some good stuff. And if you’re interested, AOL is showing 18 Nights of Bruce – a live clip from each of the US concerts. Last night’s My City of Ruins is already up. ENJOY! (I promise – no assholes.)

PS – Oh and so far no poison ivy. But I’m still itchy – although it’s kind of an all over body itch so I think it’s all in my head.

Swimmin’ with the Pugs

If you need me today, I’ll be over here. In the meantime, I’m totally co-opting this cool meme thing I saw over at Kimberly’s:

Please leave a one-word comment that you think best describes me — it can only be one word long. Then copy and paste this into your blog so that I may leave a word about you.

Go to it chickies!

My Tongue Hurths.

Thomething happened to my tongue yetherday and it really really hurths. I think I burned it. But not on the uthual tip – on the thide. Tho everytime it toucheth my teeth it hurths. FUCK!

Thanks for coming out yesterday to cheer on this grand experiment! What I love best of all is that the marjority of the comments were from people I don’t know – which is FANTASTIC! Out with the old in with the NEW! I’ve been trying to respond back to everyone in one way or another, so bear with me. If you get an email from me like six weeks from now you’ll hopefully understand. I’m slow sometimes. And no, Lucia, I don’t think that knitblogging is over. Not by a long shot – I do think that the lull these days is caused by a seasonal thing – the kids ARE out of school. The weather IS hot. We’re all feeling a bit gin and tonics on the porch-ish. (Although make mine a lemonade please.) Add to that the normal ebb and flow of knitblogs and there you have it. God help me if the knitblogs go away – how else will I fill the time avoiding deciding whether or not to try to get pregnant? (Did I just say that out loud? Shit. I kid. Kidding. (hahahaha – kid – when talking about trying to get pregnant?!) I PROMISE I am taking my medication. It’s Summer. I always go crazy in the Summer.) Change is good, or so I try to tell myself as I grasp onto the last bit of normalcy with my fingernails turning white and my hair blowing around as the winds of change try to knock my “normal” into oblivion. Change is good.

Did you know that there are no original ideas? I was all psyched about my Log Cabin Knits idea that I went out and bought the URL and everything. Then I come to find that there’s a KAL here and there was one here which I guess got folded up into this one. So, of course, I thought, does the world really need another log cabin knitalong? And suprisingly, the answer I received from the universe was a resounding YES! That’s the beauty of this thing – there’s room for EVERYONE! (Also I paid for the freaking name and by god I’m going to use it.) I’m working out some technical stuff, but I envision something with lots of white (sort of like this blog) with Show & Tell Fridays and a very, very loose format where you can post if you want or don’t want and share inspiriations and books and websites and people who inspire you and where it’s all about the LOG CABIN in every form you can think of. Just want to knit endless squares and never put them together into anything? This is the place for you. And while my log cabin was of course inspired by Mason Dixon Knitting, the log cabin’s of my future (I’ve got like 87 planned out in my head. It’s very full in there these days.) are inspired by many many many different things. Therefore this KAL will NOT be associated with MDK (which the others seem to be) except in that it bows at the feet of Ann & Kay with reverence.

What do you think? Am I being an ass trying to reinvent the wheel? Or should I just go with my vision? I would just hate to step on any toes. Opinions welcome. Thank you!

There’s MORE STUFF TO GIVE AWAY over at SPIN OUT Central. Teyani of Crown Mountain Farms has upped her prize contribution from two skeins of SOCK HOP Yarn in the never before seen colorway Love Me Tender to include one skein of superwash merino fiber (in Sock Hop Colors), one set of GORGEOUS handmade Asciano rosewood knitting needles and a handmade Jenkins turkish drop spindle. Thank you Teyani and Klaus! Morgaine from Carolina Homespun is sending us a generous prize package including learn to spin kits and fiber! Thank you Morgaine! And last but not least, Patty and Maureen from Green Mountain Spinnery in Vermont are sending in a Painted Hat kit which includes the pattern and two colors of Mountain Mohair and a carry bag. The best news though – THEY’RE COMING DOWN FROM VERMONT FOR THE EVENT! Can’t wait to meet you! THANK YOU THANK YOU!

I also heard from Heifer International yesterday – we’re like the poster child for amazing things you can do with a registry. They are very very grateful for all you are doing. Thank you from them and thank you from me.

That’s still really nice, isn’t it? Damn. Where the hell’d my MOFO go?

Crapshoot

aka Random Wednesday.

– Please go watch this video. It has given me immense pleasure this morning. I’ve watched it no less than ten times. Seriously. I just watched it again and it’s fantastic!

– Yesterday I waited for my new stove to be delivered. They were supposed to come between 1 and 5 PM. My building has strict rules – deliveries HAVE to happen before 5. At 4PM I called dispatch and said, um, remember how I told you the delivery had to be before 5, well, um, where’s my stuff? They said they’d be there. At 4:57 they called and said they’d be late. Can we try to deliver anyway? I said sure but the building will turn you away. At 5:32 I got a call from the delivery guys saying they were turned away. Can they come today? Anyone want odds that I’ll be cooking tonight? ETA: THEY’RE HERE!

– Actually, I can tell you I won’t be cooking tonight because G and I are taking my sister out to Brooklyn to finally move her stuff into her new place. She’s been staying here and for the last three nights we’ve gone “shopping.” I put the word shopping in quotation marks because even though we’ve spent hours in a handful of stores trying on hundreds of garments I think she bought like one pair of pants. Or maybe more than that but she’s returning everything but one pair of pants. My baby sister, bless her heart, can’t shop retail. She can only shop thrift stores and New Jersey, Valley of the Damned Mall, doesn’t have many thrift stores. Or at least none that I know of but I’m strictly a retail girl. I’ve learned a lot these last few days shopping with my sister. Mainly that I’m old and fat. It’s been really really disconcerting watching her try on clothes. She did point out that when I was 24 my body didn’t look like it does now (Thanks. Thanks a lot.) but I know my body doesn’t look like it did when I was 24. What bothers me is that for every size 4 she tried on it seemed like someone had a bycicle pump attached to my belly and was pumping pumping pumping me up. And this is the week AFTER my period, when I’m supposed to feel all deflated and everything. I’m not going to even get into the fashion. It’s like I’ve been living under a rock. I look at her clothes and think my god she’s got a strange sense of style – I mean she wore a cowl neck thingy to work today that I swear to god I had in seventh grade – and then I go to the stores AND THAT’S WHAT THEY’RE SELLING! I was shocked! And the brands! I haven’t even heard of half these brands. All I want is a nice pair of jeans that fits me and doesn’t cut in my crotch doesn’t show my ass crack and doesn’t flare out like a freaking parachute at the bottom. Is that too much to ask? Throw in a bit of stretch and you’ve got yourself a deal.

I have never really felt old. In my mind I’m a much more mature, oh, let’s say, 20. 20 was a good year. But these last few days I’ve felt like my sister’s mother, waiting for her outside the dressing room, all dumpy and gross in my baseball cap. So not fair. Before you tell me to stop wallowing and get off my fat ass, I have been. Last week I got on the scale and I had tipped my threshold weight. You know – the spot on the dial that you swear YOU WILL NEVER GO OVER? Yeah. I went over. But instead of waddling into to the kitchen to open the new bag of chips, I strapped on my sneakers and got out and ran. I’ve been running for a week, I guess. Today was supposed to be a run day but it’s pouring outside and I have to wait for the freaking oven guys anyway. Hopefully tomorrow. I hate the way I feel right now.

– Knittng has been nonexistant and I really, really miss it. I haven’t been bringing it with me while I’ve been out shopping with my sister which is just so stupid really. I mean, I could’ve been relaxing with my shit while she’s been trying on clothes and I just know it wouldn’t have been so awful for me. Don’t ask me why I haven’t brought it with me – I don’t know. Maybe I want to feel sorry for myself? My squares yarn came and it’s great and I found my size 5s I thought I lost and I should just sit on the couch all day today and knit but I started cleaning yesterday and it felt kind of good to see the floor again so I’ll probably keep going with that. And I have some work to do too. Bleh.

– Have I mentioned I hate Summer? It doesn’t matter if it’s rainy and cold outside, if the calendar says Summer my brain goes into hyperdrive. I’m already sick of myself and it’s only June 7th. Maybe you should reconsider sticking around. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

– There is some GOOD news around here! First up, WE HAVE AN OMBRE WINNER! The MDK girls picked

A Very Brady Ombre
(or “Groovy Ombre”) by PBnJ: Avocado Green, Burnt Orange, Harvest Gold, and “Paneling Brown.” Apprently, 1971 was Harvest Gold year for both of them! Congratulations PBnJ!

Also, we’re at $4846 in the Heifer Registry! YAY! And some new fantastic prizes came in yesterday: Paula and Kate at Woolarina are pitching in some yarn and stuff. (Go tell Paula CONGRATULATIONS on her wedding this weekend! YAY PAULA!) Allison from the Simply Sock Yarn Company has some fabulous Toasty Toes to send us. Lori Lawson, fiber artist extraordinaire, from the Capistrano Fiber Arts Studio in San Juan Capistrano, CA, is putting together a generous package of hand painted fiber and yarn for us. And last but not least, Cecil Miskin from Buffalo Gold has donated a huge gift of buffalo goodies: fiber and yarn and fiber for felting! I can’t wait to feel the buffalo! (Oh and be sure to check out the contest Buffalo Gold is sponsoring over at Wild Fibers Magazine – you can win $1000 shopping spree at Buffalo Gold!) THANK YOU ALL!