Today Lene wrote about how happy she is to be in the middle of her projects. To say I’m jealous doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel. I’m not in the middle of ANYTHING. Not work, not a book, not my knitting (well, technically that’s not really true, but…), not my spinning. Blah. Which has left me in an icky mood and I’m not sure what I want to write about so I’ll tell you some of the options:
— I could write about the socks I have on the needles that are just not doing it for me right now. I could talk about how I think about starting fifty bazillion NEW projects, like the Anemoi mittens, about a thousands times a second and then I get too tired thinking about it to even LOOK at the yarn, let alone wind it up.
— I could write about how I did too much work the other day and now I’m in between processing shoots and how my computer is making me nuts (just when eveything was finally working great) and it’s taking forever to get things going on the next job. I could write about how I was feeling like I had so much work going on and now I don’t have any on the horizon and how in about a half an hour I’m going to start panicking that no one will ever hire me again. I could also write about how I’m about to embark on a whole new work project that will hopefully do great things for my business and how I’m working with other people on this so I have to wait for them and spend lots of money and how I dream about how good it’s going to be but then I get scared that it won’t work and I’ll have wasted money and this business stuff is really scary. I’m finally getting to a place where I sort of kind of know how good I am and the potential there is for my business but I don’t know all the things I should do to grow it and then I think I’m a fake after all and it’s quite overwhelming and exciting sometimes!
— I could write about how I’m trying very hard to knit Am Kamin. I’m trying hard to love it and everytime I try to knit the freaking swatch I feel like a complete idiot because I’m trying to read the charts which aren’t even in Japanese, they’re in KNIT, which is a language I’d like to think I can speak but so far I can’t even tell which are the right side rows and which are the wrong side rows. Positives: I love the yarn I might end up using. I know how to do a tubular cast on now. I can make great photocopies of charts. Whoo HOO!
— I could write about how the Am Kamin thing is really depressing me because I NEED to knit another sweater and all signs point to this one but it’s just not working out and I think I should move on to something else but what else is there and then I could write about how there are 87,419,532 sweater patterns out there but I don’t like ANY of them.
— I could write about how my 20th High School reunion is this May and how there’s a website that I check a few times a day (which, by the way, I don’t think makes me obsessed. I know that each and every one of you – if there was a website where people you went to high school with were posting pictures of themselves now and telling you how many kids they had and whether or not they’re married and what they do for a living that you would be looking at it a few times a day too!) Yesterday I put myself on there (I used a picture from the CPH photoshoot) and how I have incredibly mixed feelings about the whole thing. I don’t speak to anyone I went to high school with and save for one friend, I never talked to ANY BODY after I left home the summer of graduation. So I’m pretty sure I’m not going to the reunion. I’d love to be a fly on the wall but unless they knit, after the obligatory what have you been doing for the last 20 years? I really don’t have anything to say to any of them. But the whole I’m 20 yrs out of high school – how did that happen because I still feel the same inside – albeit wiser and happier – as I did then thing is kind of freaky. Time flies, huh!
— I could write about the fact that I’m so not in the middle of anything that yesterday I washed the sheets on my bed, folded laundry, and vacuumed the disgusting carpet in my dining room. Yes. I did housework. Ann wanted me to check for alien probe entry points.
I hope you’re in the middle and it feels oh so good!
PS – Tell Margene happy blogiversary! Three years and counting!