Yesterday, while at the beach, happily knitting away on my knee high sock while listening to Leonard Lopate on my Creative (I think I found my podcast of choice, by the way), I WAS ATTACKED!
Well, really, I was walking back from the water where I had gotten my feet wet. We were looking for our stuff and had just located it when I shifted my eyes to the right a little bit. I was attracted to a bright pink standing out against the sand. Something in a seagull’s beak…. MY KNITTING!!!!! THE FREAKING BIRD STOLE MY KNITTING!!!!!
I grabbed my boobs and ran as fast as I could in the hot sand screaming like a banshee (are we allowed to say banshee? Or is that not politically correct?) The bird sort of waddled away from me nonplussed and I scooped up my ziploc bag with the very edge of my fingernails. GROSS!!!!!
The people closest to us were laughing at me. They asked if there was food in the bag and I said no YARN! They mumbled something about the bird grabbing the bag a few times and I wanted to say to them WHY DIDN’T YOU GET OFF YOUR FAT ASS AND SCARE IT AWAY INSTEAD OF LAUGHING? There’s a hearty dose of respect for you.
Lest you think I left the bag out in the open, I didn’t. It was closed up tight IN MY BEACH BAG. And lest you think I had food in my bag, I didn’t. THERE WAS NO FOOD IN MY BAG. Not even food for thought, unless you count two issues of the New Yorker, Barbara Walker’s Knitting from the Top and three Soap Opera magazines.
Oh my god I was so pissed. The seagull that perpetrated this horrible attack was as big as a house. G said it was no wonder – that bird would eat anything.
Forget bears, I should’ve added birds to my list.
All’s well now and I’ve gotten over it sort of – I still hate birds – but the socks survived without any apparent trauma.
The pooling is pretty similar on both socks, but the new sock is a bit lighter than the first sock – the first sock had some really dark color running through it and the new sock doesn’t have any of that. I think they look good. I hope to have the second sock finished this weekend. I’ve done about nine decreases – so only eight more to go before I get to the regular sock part.
I’m off to spend the day with my newbie knitter. She’s an old old friend I used to work with and we recently reconnected over our knitting. She’s moving away from scarves and onto felted bags. I prefer felted bags as a newbie project because they can get the time in on the knitting and they don’t have to really worry about the stitches. It’s all going to disappear anyway. AND they have a beautiful functional piece. I’m not really a scarf person either. We’re going to knit a bag together – or we’re going to each knit a bag at the same time. So I’ll have some new stuff to report come Monday. I think I’m going to make the Elizabeth Bag from Black Sheep. In red Donegal Tweed. Nice.
Have a great weekend all!
Bad birdie, bad!
And add ants to The List. Ants Must Die.
The socks are gorgeous!
Just one more reason to hate birds. Seagulls are totally the rats of the sky. Glad the sock made through ok.
Stupid birds.
ugh I HATE birds. Just HATE them! This gives yet another reason to continue my hatred.
Apparently that bird has very good taste, trying to steal your gorgeous sock!
Maybe the seagull was hungry for yarn cakes? I know I get that craving myself quite often. Thank g-d they have no calories!
Glad you got your knitting back and your new knee highs are looking quite yummy too!
a new tongue twister:
seagulls steal socks down by the seashore.
sadly, shitheads stay seated in the sand.
poor birdie. clearly he had excellent taste but so misunderstood.
I love birds but seagull’s are more rats with wings. Do you know that SLC is FULL of seagull’s? Don’t let that keep you away, however.
Have fun knitting with your friend and can’t wait to see the bag. It sounds fabulous. LOVE the socks so far!
ugh, seagulls are nasty. the kneehighs, however, are gorgeous. so glad you managed to rescue them.
Other reasons I too love bags as beginner pieces. They learn knitting flat garter stitch(the bottom), knitting in the round, decreaseing, and then (in the bag I like) purling(garter in the round edge at the top). From there they are ready for a simple top down sweater (Picovoli).
Ohmygod, Ann and her tongue-twister! ; )
I might add that I second that emotion.
Love the socks and love that they’re similar and different all at the same time.
Have fun today!!!
I’ve been working on an Elizabeth bag for something like six months. It’s in all lamb’s pride bulky – pink, lime, black, fuschia, etc. but I have to say it feels like it’s taking forever. If you do one in only a weekend I’ll feel so inadequate!
“I grabbed my boobs and ran as fast as I could…” I laughed out loud when I read that!
Oh, the Elizabeth bag. It is a beautifully designed bag, isn’t it? I love making up my own felted bag patterns (I’m putting one up on my blog today), but they can’t hold a candle to Black Sheep’s professionally designed and unique patterns.
thanks for a good laugh this morning
To run as fast as I can I have to grab my boobs too! Hilarious.
Around here we call seagulls “dump pigeons.”
You’re too funny…The socks are looking pretty darn the same! Niiiice…
It’s the pink that got to the bird. Look at their bottom beak, there’s a small red/pink bump. They’re hardwired to peck a this when young as that’s where breakfast comes from. Had your socks been only green, or blue then the bird would clearly have been looking for knitting lessons. The pink put it over the edge towards a meal.
Wow Cara all the fun stuff happens to you!
I’m about to pass out from Ann’s tongue twister – all the most clever people knit. 🙂
You crack me up! Not because a bird stole your knitting — that sucks! But because you are worried that Banshee (a creature from gaelic folklore) is not politically correct, but you have no problem saying “GET OFF YOUR FAT ASS” in the same post. LOL! I love it!
And I can’t wait to see your Elizabeth in Donegal Tweed. I think it’s gonna be incredible.
Now stay away from those seagulls!!
Darn bird–sorry it took your knitting. I think she just wanted to learn how to knit. I would have been pissed too at the nearby people who saw the whole thing happen.
Yep.. rats with wings is what we call them too. Seagulls have always been the bane of my existance at the beach. I just hate them. And people who feed them make me insane.
Oooh thank you so much….visions of you running with your boobs in your hands and screaming…classic stuff. But in all seriousness, glad you got the knitting back.
Maybe he wanted it for his nest? I leave bits and scraps of yarn out in the back yarn for the birdies to put in their nests in the spring, but not whole socks! Dumb seagulls. (Mine, mine, mine…)
I think banshee is still okay – isn’t that an Irish legend? I think it’s the ghost of a woman who died tragically (possibly during childbirth) who roams the hills wailing. Unless you’ve offended a ghost, I think banshee is still available! 🙂
Now I have to go wikipedia it. (Since apparently we’re not allowed to use google as a verb anymore.)
Glad you got your knitting back!
I was wrong, it’s a fairy woman who wails to signify an impending death. In this case, the death of a seagull…
I love that you grabbed your boobs before you ran for it… I would have done the same!! hahahaha
Now that’s LOL funny!
so funny – I confess I leave bits of yarn out for the birds in the spring too – is that like swimming with the sharks! your socks are too lovely – and many thanks for all the links – your posts are great but they take you to so many cool places too!!
My 6 year old daughter went to the beach with her grandfather. They left the closed can of pringles in their bag on top of their beach towels. A seagull snatched the can out of the bag, pried the plastic lid open and scored some pringles that afternoon. Pringles, they can have. Knitting, I don’t think so! Good thing you grabbed your boobs before running. It would have been horrible if they were left on the beach for a treasure hunter to find later!
Seagulls stealing my knitting is, like, fear #1 every time I go to the shore. Thay are ruthless!
So glad you managed to rescue your knitting and not leave your boobs somewhere…that would have been just so inconvenient!
I never imagined that a bird would steal yarn. I guess you learn something new every day.
I like Leonard Lopate but I love Bob Edwards. Ifyou can find him on a podcast (I’m sure you can) them try it. He’s great! He can make anything sound really interesting.
That was hilarious! I have to grab mine before I take off running, too. The socks look absolutely lovely! So glad they survived the ordeal!
Yeah, I was going to say banshees are okay, but Carrie beat me.
It is kind of funny — in a “oh god I hope that NEVER happens to me” kind of way — that it took knitting, but those people should’ve scared it away when they saw it in the bag in the first place.
Has Margene told you the story about seagulls being the official bird of the Mormons? Or something like that? Ask her to tell you the story. It’s a good one.
Glad your sock survived the Great Seagull Attack of ’06.
That is totally insane! What will those evil birds think of next?
I am still in shock that the people next to you never did anything to help. Being uncouth is so ample these days!
=:8
OMG! Thank you for the laugh. I needed one.
I knit on the beach all the time and I have never even given the gulls thought! I will have to pack my knitting away more carefully in future.
Oh Cara… that’s so funny! I know, it was nearly tragic, but the idea of the bird actually going into your beach bag to get the yarn… now that’s determination. 😉
OMG, that was so funny. Somewhere a magazine is screaming for the rights to that story.
I am laughing thinking of you running for that seagull… priceless! I love your knee socks!
That just goes to prove my point that birds are scary, prehistoric, yarn stealing varmints.
Miserable seagull. And everyone just watched? They didn’t say anything like “Lady, that bird is trying to steal your bag?” Sheesh.
GH? All my Kids? One Life?????? or could it be Days????
Damn seagulls! All they do is eat & shit. Used to live in So. California – so I have alot of experience with the nasty things.
Seriously!?!? That is NUTS!
OMG Cara…that was friggin hillarious!!!…still LMAO! But, yeah, I to would have been screaming like a banshee with boobs in hand, and all:o)
You go girl!…Do your thing!
I’m glad your socks survived! Are you planning on wearing them under jeans or what? I’m curious 😉
Sorry to hear about your seagull trauma. At least your sock is okay though. Your knitting them up really fast, and I’m enjoying watching your progress. I *love* your colors!
well, i spent summers on nantucket growing up, and on more than one occasion, they seemed to think my jellys (remember those plastic shoes) were fish and would fly away with them, dropping them in the moors. my dad would run around much like a banshee himself and try to scare them away!
I can’t believe that people just watched while the bird stole something from your bag. How rude!
My boyfriend had a sandwich snatched from his hand by a seagull when we were on vacation in the Channel Islands – yuck! They are a real nuisance there.
Nice socks!
I hate seagulls! My husband and I were Rehoboth Beach, DE in the spring. We were sitting on a bench on the boardwalk and I was listening to my iPod and knitting socks, of course. My yarn was in a bag inside a brand new fabric purse next to me. After a while, we got up and walked to a place to get some coffee. As I was getting into my purse, I noticed some brown stuff on my hand and then on my pants. I then discovered a huge amount on the side of my purse!!! Seagull poop! Yuck!!! At least it got the outside of the purse and not the inside as it had been sitting there open as I knit!
I am glad you didn’t lose those wonderful socks.
“i grabbed my boobs…” oh.my! i almost peed! sooooo funny! i love your space 😀
The grabbed my boobs and ran part gave me a heart a tickle too! Seagulls are flying rodents. I might have a little more understanding for a birdie who was inclined to take a bit of yarn to make a nest. But those scavengers will eat anything!
Crazy bird…sounds like he (it?) had good taste, though!
That is toooo funny!! LOL I will have to watch it on the beach. I always knit between scuba dives and snorkeling. Never thought about a bird grabbing my stash and splittin’.
Well, I like birds, but none have ever tried to steal a WIP, either. Of course I don’t do socks that much… there’re usually scads of skeins that would take an albatross to life. (Maybe THAT’s why they are extinct.)
But I totally understand about grabbing one’s boobs and THEN running. Glad everyone survived the ordeal.
Loved the entire entry, Cara! Too, too funny – would have made a hilarious video! —-Socks look super.
My favorite part of your adventure is that you grabbed your boobs to run! Now that’s something many women can relate to! glad your socks (and boobs) survived the day!