to Fits and Starts. Anyone claim that yet?
I haven’t knit since Sunday. I’m embarrassed to say that there were times I even left my house WITHOUT knitting. Scandalous I know. We’ve got less than two weeks until the big reveal and half of you have probably already guessed what’s going on but I have a date in my mind to tell you and I’m sticking to it. Suffice it to say though this has been a really really hard summer. And I can’t get ANYTHING done. I set out little tasks for myself each day and let’s just say I’m lucky I still have a business and they haven’t condemned my house. The best (or the worst) part is that I’m in such a shitty spot that I don’t care.
There are things I miss though. I miss having the energy to knit. To get things done AND knit. I miss getting lost in something – ANYTHING – and being thoroughly preoccupied. I really miss that. I miss feeling, for lack of a better word, settled. NOTHING feels settled. Decidedly unsettled.
I miss feeling like I can talk about whatever the fuck I want on my blog. Of course, my deadlines are all self-imposed, but I’m feeling like I can’t break them. No matter how much I’d like to.
Pretty pathetic post, no?
Anyway, I’ve got some GREAT news!! We’ve raised $4180! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU! More prizes next week and keep the donations coming! THANK YOU!
you are just glowing with apathy.
Cara’s readers …… Cara thinks that no one reads any of the other comments – let her know that this is not true!
I read the comments more than commenting myself. 🙂
Of course we don’t. um, so just how did I see this?
We weren’t supposed to be reading the comments?
I guessed this from the get-go. Um, it was pretty easy, having endured it twice myself. 🙂
Thinking about you the last couple of days…it’s Okay to take a step back and wait until this bit of down time is over. It WILL be over and you’ll feel like knitting and blogging and cleaning and going full steam ahead.
XOXO
Oh, I read the comments, I’m just a really sucky commenter. Weird, though, you seem to occasionally be going through the same emotions I am. Decidedly unsettled, that’s it! I forced myself to sew my miters into squares. I’ve now decided I need at least 8 more squares. I think I’ll knit socks…
Read all the comments, just sayin’. . .
Yay for raising big bucks for a great cause!!
Hope your energy returns soon.
If your big reveal is what I think it is, this too shall pass. Just go with the flow, no one is going to scold you for not feeling like knitting. You’ll have plenty of time to knit and have energy and all that good stuff!
No worries, sweetie.
If I’m guessing right, I have felt the same way myself several times … and the feeling does pass. Hang in there.
i read the comments sometimes. and i hope i know what’s going on. i hope, i hope.
feel good.
You usually have such interesting comments: of COURSE i read them. It’s part of the overall experience, which would be incomplete without the comments. Hope you’re feeling ok today. Mwah!
Hi, Cara –
I read your blog AND the comments! I am having some sort of knitting ennui this week, too. It must be something about the dog-days of summer.
Take it easy…everyone says it passes 🙂
I read the post and all the comments. Yes, we all guessed what we’re guessing already, and you told us we were wrong. I’m guessing you are a big fat liar, and getting bigger and fatter every day.
Whatever it is, hang in there. This too shall pass, indeed.
Heh. Ann cracks me up. Delurking to tell you that I most definitely read your comments, and that I THINK I know what the big reveal is all about…you are going to be just fine.
Yup, I’m delurking too… I enjoy reading your blog AND the comments… always so much fun… I just never have anything clever to say, so I lurk… 🙂
Summer’s almost over… you’ve almost made it! Hang in there!
The apathy passes. Then the cleaning and organizing fairy bites you on the ass.
Reading the comments is part of the fun of reading the blog.
I’m sorry you’re in a rough spot. Hope you can be gentle with yourself (says one who has a hard time doing that myself).
Oh, and I also read the comments. Sometimes I revisit the blog later in the day to read more comments!
I’m total crap at commenting, but I do read them! And the blog. Hang in there – my mom calls times like this “the narrows”, when it seems like your whole world view has narrowed down to what’s bad and hard and trying in life – and then boom, you’re through it and over it, and things start to get better. You can make it through.
If your thing is what I think it is I’m in the same boat just a bit farther along than you are. It gets better, my energy and desire to knit came back after the first 3rd of the journey.
I read the blog and the comments but never comment. But I commenting today to say I’m pretty sure I know what the reveal is, I spent last summer in exactly the same condition (physically ill, physically and mentally exhausted, and feeling bad that I felt that way). But boy, oh boy, when the fall came around and I was past that feeling and the air was cool and crisp – I was on cloud nine!
Hang in there. I rolled my eyes at everyone who said it would pass, but it really did!
Looking forward to the big reveal and I do read the comments!
I read them at times…like this. Good times ahead!
I always read the comments. Am I supposed to read the posts too?? Crappers.
no idea what the big reveal is – but read the comments faithfully for clues!!! am i the only clueless one? i need a ouija board for the answer.
knitting will happen – it always does. hang in there.
Of course I read the comments. If it what I and many others think it is, the feeling will pass. Been there done that. Just think of what you will have at the end of the journey.
You’ve been planting hints here, there and everywhere for a while now 🙂 Being a commenter I read all of the comments here and elsewhere and have been noticing yours too elsewhere. You’ll be fine. Changes in one’s life always come with uncertainties, doubts and some form of grieving for what once was. This too shall pass- the cooler weather will bring about more energy, less restlessness and a feeling of well-being. It’s something you’ll grow into with time- no pun intended. Keeping my fingers crossed for you and looking forward to the reveal.
I know, but I ain’t tellin’.
Oh and “Fits and Starts” is certainly better than if you switch those first consonants around…
And no, I never read the comments.
O.K. So I know that we are not supposed to be guessing event though we all think we know what it is…. I am sure that me and the rest of your readers are keeping their needles crossed that we guessed right:)
Take it easy! We love your knititng but we understand:)
I’m a horrible guesser and not a great commenter either, but I do read your posts all the time. I don’t have any sense of whether any of my thoughts will be close at all to what your reveal will be, yet I feel like I understand because I may be moving 2 states away and I can’t tell anyone because the decision has not been made. Hang in there!
I do read the comments, though hardly ever comment! Loved the suggestion of changing the consonants!
The worst of days will be followed by the best of days, and I bet your aunt would agree!
Annette
Well, I’m feeling like a knitting schizo these days. Working on a zillion things and getting nothing done. I’m committed to the Tilted Duster from IK Fall ’07, but I am scared that even the “need” to complete it won’t be enough. Don’t be hard on yourself, everything has an ebb and flow (think I’ve spent too much time at the beach this week? I could really go on, but I’ll spare you).
You can’t get rid of us that easily 🙂
I didn’t think it was that because you said it wasn’t that, but I read the comments and see that everyone thinks it is that so now I’ll think it is that and I hope it really is that because then I’ll really be: yay!
I always read comments.
And I love the potential new name for the blog – Fits and Starts. Better grab it up before someone else does, Cara!
Lookie at what Ann started with her first two comments. Way to go, Ann! And, Cara, if you switch the blog name, I won’t have any reason to stay up on New Year’s Eve because I won’t remember when your birthday is. So there! Oh, and rest up . . . you’ll need it!
You already told us a long time back that you are not pregnant and don’t have a book deal. My only other thought is you might have a job.
I am certainly wondering about the big reveal, but I am patient and you will tell us when you are ready. I love your blog, your photos, and the way you just put yourself out there. Oh yeah, and the knitting, too. You’ll feel like knitting again later, in your own time, and we’ll be happy to look at what you knit then.
I cannot seem to knit a stinkn thing these days-I think about it alot and get like a row done here and htere but nothing that has been finished in MONTHS. It is killing me. And I am just finally getting my house somewhat clean for the first time all summer since school has started again. But you know what? the dirt will always be around-it will wait for you to get to it when you are ready-no biggie!
OK, so what I thought it was was what you told us it wasn’t but the more time goes by the more it ‘feels’ like what I thought it was IS what it is so I hope that you hang in there because after the first part, you WILL feel more like yourself and it will all be good! (how’s THAT for a f’ing long run-on sentence!)
Sorry to hear about the not-knitting continuing. Sucky feeling, for sure.
And for what it’s worth, I read the comments occasionally, but not faithfully. It tends to depend on how many comments there are…
Here’s to more donations and the blues lifting soon!
Sometimes Fits and Starts is better. It could be Sits and Farts. Take care!
I too thought I knew and you said it wasn’t…
I don’t always read the comments (or read all of the comments)–depends what kind of hurry I’m in to comment myself!
if it’s what we all think it is, it’s good to wait til the 4th month to reveal… good choice.. AND I promise, your energy will return, you’ll feel so much better, and when the kick begins, it really gets rockin.
we’re all grinning out here, just so you know..
I agree with some of the other comments. You said a while ago it wasn’t true but with many hints that you have given I think it is true. Woohoo!!!!
I’m looking forward to the big reveal, hoping it’s what I think it is! You’ll feel better soon.
Ha, I had the thought the other day of re-naming my blog to ‘knits and starts’ but then thought better of it.
So you’re getting a dog, right? 😉
you’re opening a candy store? Rock on!
I can’t take the pressure. . .please reveal early. . please.
I’m not a comment reader (and am a sporadic commenter, if not an even more sporadic blogger)… I’ve been in a wierd knitting mood all summer- obsessed with all things lace (which I’ve never been able to “do” well before), and am neglecting the Summer of Socks despite my personal goal of spending more at Black Sheep on STR than last year. (Accomplished part one!)
I don’t know what the big reveal is, I hope its positive, though. But it’s been keeping me in all kinds of suspense waiting!
Have no clue whatsoever what is going on. And this with reading the comments!?!
Whatever is going on though, don’t sweat it. It’ll get better, and you’ll feel better and you’ll knit again.
Time makes everything better, and when it does, we’ll all still be here cheering you on.
I read faithfully, but don’t normally comment. I love your photos and all of your knitting. After reading the comments here, I think I might know, even though it’s not supposed to be what I think it is. Can’t wait to find out!
Your cryptic-ness (is that a word?) cracks me up. If you are dealing with what I am dealing with (only 6 weeks to go,) the creativity returns in full force, along with an incredible desire to be organized–although not much energy to be organized! If it isn’t that, I hope you are opening a cool yarn shop or online store or planning a fantastic world cruise!! Take it easy!
Ok, so I haven’t been reading the comments lately, but I can now tell that everyone else thinks the same thing I think about the big secret. Yep, when your sister brought you flowers to Kabuki, I thought to myself… Hmmm, I think I know what’s going on here. Secrecy, napping, and those delightful twins, apathy and lethargy. Alls I can say is, that EZ surprise jacket seems to be taking over blogland, so you better get on it. 🙂
Those are some pretty hilarious comments! I like the one about switching the first letters of “Fits and Starts”!
Hang in there–this too shall pass…
Okay I am thinking, 3 months dreary, 3 months cheery, and 3 months weary and then a bundle of love. I am so hoping I’m right. I had my first at 42 and the second at 44. I’m thinking girl that this is your reveal.
I won’t try to guess what your big news is as I have not been reading this blog for long. But I am sorry to hear that you have had a really really hard time lately and a shitty summer. You’ll get back into the swing of things! I love looking at your knits. You take really sumptuous photos of them too. Take care and I’ll check back for the big announcement. Max
I hope you get over/past/through the stressy feelings soon. Been there, done that, not fun. As for guessing – I don’t do that. I’m the antithesis of the person who reads the last page of a book first. I fingers-in-the-ears-la-la-eyes-closed my way through the bits of bonus features on a tv series dvd that are clips from episodes on later disks (why do they do that anyway? to punish me for not watching the series when it was broadcast?)
Love love love…
Hey, I got to say “Prove it all night” in the new column without anyone editing it out, by the way. Out of all the other things in there, I swear that’s the best part, getting to quote Bruce without anyone telling me that’s not very knitterly 😉
I can’t predict what’s going on in my own life, I am amazed that people can guess what’s going on in yours!
Of COURSE I read the comments. Them’s half the fun.
We’re all so used to January one. Why change it?
Of course we read comments.
Good luck.
I read the comments, but hardly ever comment myself. I’m not sure why… What ever the “it” is, it’s your reveal and do it when you want. I know that self imposed dates are sometimes the hardest to break, speaking from experience. Here’s to hoping you’ll feel better soon!
I read your blog because I really care. I read your comments because they’re really intelligent and funny.
You are preparing for something new. Even if you’re only doing it in your mind. It takes a lot of energy to make a shift.
When I’m really writing crap, I sit down to intentionally write crap and pat myself on the back for meeting personal goals. It soon opens the door to better things. Knit some crap just for a break.
When I feel awful, I love to submerse myself in the pictures of your mitered squares.
Just keep on muttering “times and seasons” to yourself. At least it works for me whenever I get frustrated about the fits and starts in my life…
I think I know I think I know….oh I hope I’m right….you go girl…….needles are definitely crossed……cg
Like Ann said, I do read the comments! But after I leave mine. I need to stay focused 😉 Look at it this way, you knit so many BIG things, your breaks in between still leave you at a way above average FOer. Not bad at all…I’ll my 2 cents in as soon as the check arrives, this is one tough summer. I still have my little guess in mind, but will wait for the reveal. Teaser!!!
I don’t always read the comments, but always read your blog – thanks for telling it like it is no matter what. I really appreciate that in the world of everyone so afraid of offending someone or something. I like knowing if I read it at January one it’s true. Thanks and congrat’s
Comments matter! Do you have site meter or something similar? I was SO happy to find out that the Harlot had lurked in my modest corner of the net! There are probably LOTS of people who just stop and admire.
Comments matter! Do you have site meter or something similar? I was SO happy to find out that the Harlot had lurked in my modest corner of the net! There are probably LOTS of people who just stop and admire.
Um, are you going to reveal that you’re not going to blog anymore? I really really really loveu your blog, so I’d be bummed about that, but I know you’ve gotta do what you gotta do. but I was under the impression that the reveal was something good so I’m confused. Guess I’ll just have to keep checking back! 😉
Ah, we creatives call this not-producing time “fallow time.” It’s the winter rest that allows us to continue renewed in our creative “spring.”…
Interesting that most are guessing you are pregnant, though you denied that in the beginning.
me? too busy to guess. Just waiting.
Fess up – you and G are moving to New Zealand to start an organic sheep farm!
Ya GOTTA read the comments…it’s almost as much fun as eavesdropping!
I read the comments often, but not always. Often.