We went to the Cancer Hospital today which is possibly the saddest place on Earth. But everyone is extra friendly which somehow makes it sadder. Like you have to get cancer for humans to extend a bit of courtesy and warmth. I know that’s not really true but sometimes it feels like that. And yes I’m still a little bit bitter.
Next Tuesday G will have surgery to remove a wide area around the lesion (he’s calling it his pound of flesh) and at the same time they will biopsy the lymph nodes where the melanoma may have spread. The doctor we saw today told us we have every reason to be very optimistic that it hasn’t spread, so that’s what we’re going to be. If it hasn’t spread, that’s it. It’s done. There’s nothing more to do except be vigilant with sunscreen for the rest of his VERY LONG life. If it has spread, well, then, that opens up a whole other can of worms but we’re not going to go there. If the expert doctor told us to be optimistic then there’s no reason NOT to be. We won’t know the results of the biopsy for around two weeks.
Which leaves me about a week before my birthday. G’s been asking me if there’s anything I want for my birthday and I told him that the only thing I will ever want for the rest of my birthdays is for our family to be healthy. But this year especially for HIM to be healthy. That’s all I want. There was a question in the comments about where to send me a birthday present – thank you so much for thinking of me, but no presents are necessary. If you INSIST on doing something for my birthday, please consider a donation to the Skin Cancer Foundation or a charity of your choice. That would be the best present ever – besides my husband being healthy.
Thank you all for your comments on yesterday’s post. I’m in awe of all of you! There is so much to learn from each other if only we could get over our own hangups – you know? Remind me next time to tell you about the summer I thought I should be admitted to a mental hospital – now that’s a DOOZY! 😉
Off to knit more sleeves….
Please spend some time talking about how you now have everyone who reads your blog also hopelessly addicted to Snood. Snoodicted, I believe, is what they call it. Yep, that’s me.
So far so good! Waiting is Hell tho. Knit on.
As you know – I work at a cancer hospital and I totally get what you’re saying. It is simultaneously the most joyful and saddest place on earth. Especially in the pediatric areas. If the Doc is optimistic you should defo be too. Docs are often optimistic for no reason…they try to manage expectations.
Okay, you asked for it, you got it. $20 donation to the Skin Cancer people for you and G. And all the good karma that comes with it!
Optomistic works for me.
Hi Cara! Keeping you and your dh in my prayers and for him to get a clean bill of health. Hugs, Rosalia
In all my interactions with doctors, I find that they are pretty cautious to say they are optimistic about something, so they wouldn’t say it unless they meant it. All that to say, be optimistic!
If wishes were horses, you’d have a herd! Sending you mine. . .
Sending lots of good vibes to you and your husband.
Here’s to optimism. Wishing you and Georgie all the best.
All day my thoughts were with the two of you. It’s good to hear what we’ve been thinking all along…there are more reasons to focus on the positive. Smith is away and Moxie won’t talk to me (mad at Smith, I guess). Guess I’ll go spin;-)
g is being treated at one of the best cancer hospitals in the world. he’s going to be fine. you have to believe that.
stay positive cara.
Hoping you get a very happy belated birthday present from G, which is his clean bill of health.
Thanks for sharing your journey with us. We’re all cheering for you both.
Sendng good vibes yours and your hubbys way.
Be freakin’ optomistic. Sending some good thoughts to y’all.
They do take a wide margin, but that’s a good thing. Traumeel ointment really helps. Vitamin E oil and shea butter to decrease scarring. After the tissues heal, continue gently massaging cream into the area and he’ll end up with a lot less scar tissue (they cut pretty deep for cutaneous mel).
My surgeon was able to tell me within minutes that he thought I’d be okay, but waiting a few weeks for confirmation from Mayo was terrifying.
I wish you both the best of luck — it’s scary! Remember to breathe, eat, and rest even if you cannot sleep.
Optimistic sounds very, very good. Best of luck to both of you. I hope you have to start stocking up on sunscreen, big hats, and umbrellas in about two weeks!
My thoughts are with you and G!
my glass is always full (mostly of wine but full none the less). I send you all my good thoughts and vibes!
I am certainly glad to hear that there is lots of optimism in the air. I worked in an oncology office for a short time and I would echo what someone said above about it being joyful and sad all wrapped into one. I certainly saw a lot of strength exhibited even in the face of the difficulties of the human condition.
my grandpaw doesn’t go to Dr’s. he got a gift certificate to a Dr. weird i know, but he went. turned out he had a melanoma on his back,larger than the size of the dr’s hand. he had several others besides that. all were removed successfully and he has done well. it has not spread. Praying for them to find fabulously clear lymphnodes!
Holding good thoughts for G’s lymph nodes to be perfectly clear. And a quick recommendation for arnica montana – homeopathic and fabulous to help minimize the post-surgical bruising and swelling. I used it before and after my mastectomy and the docs were floored by how little bruising I had. Backchannel me if you want more info. Oh, and ditto on the Snoodicted. Sigh.
I’ll be thinking healing thoughts and sending white light and good juju! All the best with everything.
A day at the cancer hospital…{big exhale}…blech. Well, one day at a time, sweetie. See, here’s one of the ironies of what cancer (or any life-threatening condition, I suppose) does–it suddenly and oddly makes you feel a greater connection to the human family, their struggles and triumphs–so here I am presuming to call you sweetie.
Amen to what Sylvia said above–and one more bit of unsolicited advice: Stay off the cancer websites during those nights when you can’t sleep. Leave any internet research for later when you have the biopsy reports back. Then you won’t fill your head with useless and stressful information that doesn’t apply to you.
Prayers for G. and you.
I second nixing the cancer sites on the internet. It is the same with all the medical sites out there, they always seem to give worst case senarios. My hubby learnt the hard way, he has a shoulder injury and had convinced himself that the specialist would insist on surgery – thankfully her was wrong 🙂
Sending lots of good thoughts your way.
Ditto about the websites. Oh, they can scare the crap out of you! You NEED positive thoughts. George needs your positive thoughts. Don’t let any of that scary crap even into your head (or his). They really do put the worst case up on most of those sites and that’s not what Geo has — we are affirming a minor case and quick return to being cancer-free (it’s become part of my morning meditation routine). Hang in there, girl. We’re all pull for you both.
Considering birthdays (and mortality), I wonder if your dear husband would like you to suggest something he can DO for you, as well as something he can BE for you.
Continuing to send good thoughts your way!
(Love the photo of the week, BTW.)
My father just finished spending all his days in cancer offices from radiation to chemo. I was amazed at what loving places full of hope, and such places of community, they could be. Dad loved getting to know all the other patients, especially since my mother would not really allow him to acknowledge any weakness or fear. Cancer hospital was his refuge.
good thoughts and well wishes go out to you and G.
Hi, Cara. When I was 14 I had a mole in my hand quickly become bigger and gain thickness, so it was extracted and biopsied in a cancer hospital. (the staff was so loving and caring, by the way). Precisely in mid-December. And it was benign, and my health is still fine (I’m 30). I am hoping that your husband’s extraction, in the same time of year, will have the same result: benign. Will keep you in my thoughts…
Sending you lots of positive thoughts and good wishes. And look what that did for Mr. Etherknitter! 🙂
ditto to everything – including the HORRIBLE, AWFUL SNOODDICTION I’ve contracted from you – and I didn’t even know if was communicable!!! Docs are required to provide you with the risks, benefits, and alternative treatments for EVERYTHING – that said they have to tell you all the worst in order for you to make informed consent. Sometimes all that extra knowledge can be overwhelming – I too am positively optimistic. And remember you CAN STILL DO the beach – just responsibly – heck, I put sunscreen in the part of my hair!!!
It’s actually a good thing that the doc told you! I’ve been thru this kind of thing a few times and when they say be “optimistic”, it’s because they are. {Here} That’s all my good Karma in a hug.
Best wishes to your husband Cara, as I have been through something like this also and know how it can be very trying. Our prayers are with you guys!
Ok – I haven’t been reading blogs as much as I should lately and Gd forbid my idiot brother tells me anything… Please let us know if there is anything you need – seriously. Prayers, good vibes and good thoughts going out to you and your sweet G.
Yes I too am addicted to Snood as is my husband and daughter now. Thanks!
You’re inspiring total sweater envy over here. I’m sort of chilly at my desk, so I thought I’d swing by your gorgeous sun’n’sand pictures when you hit me with an eyefull of sea green goodness. Yummy!(how’s G? Been thinking about him and you lately!)
I know what you mean about the PR in the cancer departments. Sobering.
The surgery will go well. I’ll put in a good word in the General Ether.
delurking to say my thoughts are with you. my dad is in and out of the same cancer hospital as your G (i think) and i know exactly what you mean, but let me tell you. they are the best people ever.
the.best.ever.
i thank them in my heart everyday for giving my dad more time, how much we dont know, but for now we have the holidays.
good luck. stay positive. knit on. 🙂