I’m looking over a Four Leaf Clover….

Can I just tell you? I’m so NOT a fan of St. Patrick’s Day. There isn’t an ounce of irish blood in me or my husband, I’m not a drinker, and I’m not so into green. Add to that I used to live on the same block as McSorley’s, where people would literally line up around the block to get in on St. Pat’s Day. The street would be lined with Porta-Potties and still there was a river of puke and piss. I also worked a few blocks from Fifth Avenue in the 50s (around the corner from St. Patrick’s Cathedral) for many years and basically you couldn’t leave the office on March 17th. BUT today. Well today I am as Irish as they come. All for my friend Vicki! She sent out the bat signal yesterday and I’m here to respond. It’s been a tough month over at Vick’s and I want you all to go on over and wish her brother Michael a happy birthday and send a big ol’ pot of gold at the end of the rainbow for him. He’s got some surgery going on today and all my wishes and hopes and prayers are with the Knitorious family! I LOVE YOU VICKI! (And don’t forget – tell Vicki and Ann congrats on their YEAR QUIT DATE!!!! I’m so PROUD of both of them! YAY!)

What’s that you ask? Why I’d be happy to tell you!

You know, I thought I was the proudest ever when I completed the first back of Short Rows. Then I thought I was the TOTAL SHIT when I finished REKNITTING the back because of gauge issues and FINISHED the front. When I finished the sleeves, well, let me tell you baby it was going to be all ends all the time at Chez January One. Yeah. Right.

NOTHING. None of my other knitting accomplishments, with this project, or any other project, prepared me for the elation I felt when I did this:

I DID IT!!!! I WOVE IN EVERY SINGLE FREAKING END! Now, in case you’re not suitably impressed, we’re talking 1,472,039 ends. Literally. That is no exaggeration. Want a reminder?


Click to see it bigger so you can actually count the ends.

Yeah. I thought so. I’m SO HAPPY I didn’t take any shortcuts! I’m so freaking happy. Who cares if I never sew it up and give it a collar and ever wear it. I WOVE IN THE ENDS! Sigh. It’s the little things in life, right?

Don’t worry all you short row freaks out there. I will sew it up and I will knit the collar and I will wear it. Although I have to say I’m really really really nervous about it. I mean, what if I put it on and it doesn’t fit? Or I put it on and someone splashes spaghetti sauce on me? Or I just eat normally and get crap all over it? What if I sweat in it (I’m a bad perspirer) and I get all kinds of deodorant stains on it and then it’s ruined forever? What if it doesn’t ohmygod fit? So see, if I procrastinate a little bit it’s only because I’m afraid that if I actually finish it I might have to wear it and then I might ruin it and it’s been a year since I started this and it will be my greatest knitting accomplishment and is that pathetic because maybe this project isn’t as great I thought it once was and it’s like a pullover with some stripes easy peasy and who will care? And what if it doesn’t FUCKING FIT?

Comments

  1. IT WILL FIT! You’re going to love it and wear it often.
    Everyone thinks because my birthday is around St. Pat’s Day that I’d love green. You know, green cakes, green beer…all that. But today I am Irish for Vicki, too and I have on my green socks just for Michael!

  2. Not Irish here either. But my mom liked to get on the holiday bandwagon so we celebrated. I’m thinking good thought for Michael all day long. And wearing green socks, too, like Margene.
    Shorts rows is awesome – and it will fit, don’t worry! You’re so close, aren’t you itching to wear it?

  3. Lovely, truly lovely! Can’t wait to see it all put together. I’m amazed at the work it took to knit in all those pesky ends!

  4. No worries. It’ll fit someone. ;)
    ps – i’m keeping my eye out for decent airfare to come down for one of kay’s readings…is that okay?

  5. This post just made me totally crack up.

  6. I used to celebrate the day back when I went to a mostly Irish-catholic college. It was a school holiday, so you might as well go get drunk along with everybody else. Like NY Eve, now it’s a good night to stay home and off the streets.
    All those ends might have driven me to drinking green beer, though. That might have been a good reason to call out the Knit Posse for help!

  7. Your sweater pieces look wonderful–can’t wait to see them all together! And, St. P’s day? Not that big a fan, either, although I did accidentally wear green today–not Kelly green. I don’t have a single item of anything I can think of in that shade. But the olive/spring/apple green that I really do love. That color. Though I grabbed the shirt out of my closet this morning before the March 17th thing had registered. We don’t have any Irish in us, either, and my Mom used to hate St Patrick’s day because her dad was a policeman in Newark and all his buddies would get drunk and, well, bad memories. She was not happy about my wearing green today. In fact, she had her gall-bladder out five years ago today, and had been joking beforehand that the hospital just better not expect her to wear a green gown while she was there . . . (grin)

  8. OMG… You definitely have mad weaving skillz. I totally understand not wanting to finish it for fear of ruining it. I have that fear too… It keeps me from knitting fronts of sweaters…

  9. It’ll fit! And it’ll be fabulous and you’ll love it! So there.

  10. It WILL fit. Repeat. It WILL fit.

  11. Wear it and take a nice photo. Then wear it without fear. I’ve noticed if you worry too much about spilling, you will certainly spill something on it. As to the “drinking holidays”, nothing says “fun” more than someone puking on your shoe, and you’re dead sober. We’re staying home.

  12. I second the “mad weaving skills” comment. It will fit, you will love it, no stains will befall you.

  13. It will fit, and you won’t get sauce, crap, or sweat on it! That’s the Irish blessing I’m bestowing upon you and your sweater in honor of St. Patrick’s Day! (It wouldn’t hurt to kiss the Blarney Stone for luck, just in case!:)

  14. it will fit and it will be fabulous – and even if, by some craaaaaazy coincidence, it doesn’t fit, it’s no less an accomplishment! of course, if it makes you that made, you could always felt it.

  15. Finish it. It’s too great not to wear. It’s really really GREAT. Coolest design. xox Kay

  16. I really hope that it fits and that you love it because I’ve been rooting for you and this sweater since you started it.

  17. oh
    my
    god
    All those ends make me want to fucking kill myself and I didn’t even have to weave any of them in!!
    (it’s looking cool, though!)

  18. That’s so funny, I used to live on the McSorley’s block too! Right across the street at 32 E 7th. It ALWAYS ALWAYS smelled like pee on our block! Thanks McSorleys!

  19. It will fit!!! That’s a fabulous accomplishment Cara! nicely done!!

  20. does this mean I shouldn’t make spaghetti and meatballs when you visit? or does it mean I should get out a bib? I hope it doesn’t mean I have to spoon feed you!

  21. Wow. I bow to you, Oh Amazing Weaver-In of Ends. It will have to fit now.

  22. Ha ha ha ha! That last paragraph goes through my head for every sweater I start knitting. Seriously. Gah! I’m sure Short Rows will be fabulous and will fit you and will have a mysterious magical stain repelling aura. I’m so excited that you wove in all those ends! Yay!

  23. Thank you, darlin’! I think it worked!! Thank you for being Irish today. ; )
    I can’t believe it’s been a year since we quit. Amazing. I claimed Fairy Blogmother rights over at Ann’s, and I’m further asserting them here. I’m so happy for the friendships that have been born and continue to grow and evolve. Thank YOU.
    I am a freak, aren’t I? Because I can’t even describe how I feel, seeing Short Rows like that… the anticipation is killing me! It will fit!!! (I dribbled on Williamsro today, it’s what they make wipes for…)

  24. I’m so proud of you. Those ends look like hell.

  25. Would you just sew the friggin’ thing up and get on with it? Honestly. :)

  26. Hey, I’m Irish and I don’t drink (okay maybe a social one about once in a blue moon).
    Anyway, keep perspective – there will always be nuts out there to ruin good things.

  27. If you baste that sucker together, you can know the answer to this in about a half an hour.
    Just sayin’.

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  29. Oh, Cara, it’s gonna fit, and it’s gonna look great! At least that’s what I’m crossing my fingers for, since I have yarn lined up to make this and have watched your every step and waited to see you make it to the end. You’re almost there! Me, I’m finally ready to turn the heel on my second Jaywalker ~

  30. It will fit and it’ll be fabulous!

  31. I was just looking through some of knitting magazine back issues and I remember seeing that sweater and loving it, but not wanting to do it. Yours looks awesome and it will fit, no worries!

  32. Oh. My. God. You did it. You showed those ends. Holy chibi, batgirl, I’m proud of you!!!!!!! It’s going to be fabulous. Itwillfititwillfititwillfit.
    BookishWendy is a funny girl.

  33. omg! i checked the number in the picture and it IS actually 1,472,039 ends!
    i am so proud of you! only a few small seams now and a beautiful, well-fitting, comfy, stainless, new sweater is yours.